My island home

Nigel can feel the breeze blowing through his hair (all over) and whilst he can smell the wafts of jasmine and almost hear the ukulele playing softy in the background. Nigel is feeling perplexed and slightly irritated and it's not just the sunburn and sand fly bites although they are annoying. It's Barry he is always hanging around. Get your own freaking tree bro'!

Large brooch $45

Nana's Medallion

Nana might not understand the spunk of today's crazy youth with their sawn off shot guns, razor edged saws, wizz fizz and peyote fueled weekends. But...she does however like doilies and bedazzling gems. The old girl does like to sparkle on the cheap! Thrifty.
Winner, winner chicken dinner! This one is for you Nanaconda.


Nana's Medallion, small brooch $30

Wheel de Beast

This Motley crue are abused underpaid performers for the well known television station B.C. They are the regular stars of 'Sale of Last Century' frequently seen pouting and shimming around product placement. People don't realise how dangerous this business of excess is...
Abraham has developed a rash from last weeks expensive lava day spa. He would rather live with his laughter lines than be loofered with pumice and frangipani petals ever again.
Tyrone's love of all things leather and stiletto has given him back complaints and a bit of chaffing. OUCH!
Little country bumpkin Timmy, didn't realise the effect his sex symbol status would have on the ladies, he feels objectified.
So in conclusion they are sick of being stereo-typed into the really, really good looking dinosaur category. Charlie, Tyrone, Abraham and little Timmy are now looking for a union that will fight for your right to party without judgement.

Wheel de beast Large brooch $45

J.J

With his rockstar good looks and streamlined physique, this Goggomobil mechanic is wanting his cake and eating it too. With his fluid dynamic it doesn't take much for this lothario to lure the ladies into his shark net.
With so many hot lady fish in the sea, he works his magic with slow dancing to Nina Simone and hot pashing action... kinda like high school. J.J.'s main aim is to get his dermal denticles rubbed and massaged.
On weekends and public holidays J.J enjoys the odd surfer or two, he likes to play 'spot the honeymooner', it's his absolute favourite. It is quite the sport and keeps him trim, although the neoprene flossing can be irritating.
"Show us your white pointers, call me back in 5...."
J.J really is the love rat of the ocean.

J.J small brooch $30

Pony Club

Ed is all horse. In fact a Mongolian stallion living in Caulfield South. Show pony doesn't even begin to cover it....Ed has been known to lace his hay with muscle building powder that he purchases from the boot of shady Shaneel's car, at the rear of Woolies (after dark and on a full moon). Ed is all about performance enhancements, which to his detriment sometimes leads him up the garden path. A real bum steer. He still hasn't seen Clarice or Snouty since that fateful night with the shaman. The other pony's in the stables just don't appreciate the botox around his eyes or his man defining cleft chin. He is silky smooth, tight and shiny, just how he likes it.


Pony Club, medium brooch $35

Join 'Jungle Lurve' mating service club. Where all creatures get to dance....

Put on your kaleidoscopic glasses of lurve, splash on the eau de cologne, Love Potion 182, blow your hair back and buckle up (or unbuckle) for the ride of your life at Jungle Lurve mating service club.
Down here at club Jungle you can expect to receive on entry, a party pack which includes: the manual "The do's,don'ts and only occasionally, if they said yes of Lurve'. This tell all book by the respectable Dr. Carmen Again, is very revealing and gets the heart pumping...throw that gym membership away for good. Also included is a keyring and a guarantee of a least three sizzling hot hot dates. A feelgood bookmark of affirmations, a pen and a heart for your sleeve. Now, repeat after me "I am a lurve beast".

Check out this talent...meet:

Name: Ling Ling
Age: 28
Sex: yes please
Nationality: chinese
Occupation: dental nurse
A bit about me: I am a vegetarian who likes it spicy. I like long weekends spent in the wilderness listing to exotic bird calls, coocoo. I also quite like the smell of tape. It's a bit out there but i am a crazy kind of bamboo loving mammal.



Name: Harriet
Age: 43
Sex: Female
Nationality: African
Occupation: writer for well known travel company
A bit about me: I am a mature woman. Full of potential and love just awaiting that right someone to bulldoze with love. I need someone with substance, the water to my wade. Please, no pansy's need apply.


Name: Charlie
Age: 36
Sex: once
Nationality: Gondwanalandinian
Occupation: Make up artist for the stars
A bit about me:I have a petite mouth but its not the size that counts its what you can do with it and trust me that one time... was amazing.
Call me, I'm not fussy.


All medium love brooches $35

Nigel

This is Nigel, he is a dentist and for privacy reasons we can not show you his face. Not only is Nigel a highly recommended dentist, he has peppermint fresh breath and nimble fingers. In his after hours private time Nigel enjoys dressing like a fighter pilot and gets his friends to call him Captain.
At work however, he is very professional and although his hygiene standards are high, his trusty assistant Ling Ling is for ever plucking stray black back hairs from inappropriate places...like filling mixtures, in between patients teeth, on the lid of the antiseptic bottles, in her sandwich and on the dental dams etc.
Ling Ling wonders whether she can approach her hirsute boss? Should she leave a suggestion in the suggestion box? Should she just drop subtle hints? Or should she flat out tell him she is going into the Meerkin weaving business and she is going to farm him???
Poor Ling Ling.


Nigel, medium brooch $35